Starting Weight – 213.6
Current Weight – 212.0
Here we go again. ;) New year, new “diet”, new goals and plans.
Summing up the last three months of 2016 could be easily described as dedication and motivation in the gym, dedication and motivation to please myself food-wise outside of the gym. In addition to cigarette use and alcohol consumption…it took me a good month, month and a half to stop bitching about why I wasn’t seeing results, and surrender to the fact that I wasn’t doing all I could to succeed.
So the last month and a half of 2016, I made peace with my lack of progress and got real with myself on what it was going to take to make those results come. I knew I had to give up the smoking, the drinking and the obvious poor choices in food. My beloved took it a step further and found The Whole 30 program…basically eating nothing but meats, vegetables and fruits for 30 days. No dairy, no legumes, no grain, and most especially, no sugar. The idea behind the program is to remove these foods from your diet and allow your body to take a break from inflammatory substances which are 90% of the cause of stress/disease in our body. “You are what you eat” isn’t just a funny phrase…
No alcohol for 30 days, easy. I can go six months or longer, no problem.
No smoking for 30 days, and beyond…a little harder, but I’ve been very ready to quit for the last few weeks. I had two yesterday and two today, but I’m very close to being done done DONE done……….done.
No sugar/grain/legumes for 30 days. Easy too I think. It’s not fun, it’s not ideal, I’m not happy about it…but easy? I think it will be. My mindset recently has been in such a state of peace about “what is”. And when I think about “what is”, I get very clear about certain realities. They are, in no certain order, and certainly not the entire list:
The food I’ve been eating/craving is shit.
30 days isn’t forever.
30 days isn’t two months.
30 days isn’t six months.
30 days is nothing.
30 days to create a habit.
30 days to change a habit.
I’ve done the crazy 11 day diet, and that was with less appetizing foods, and controlled with specific meals at specific times. I am not controlled on this diet, and while I don’t have the two slices of bread I got in the 11 days, or the plethora of cheeses and dairy I was allowed to have…I feel like this is an additional perspective on the idea that certain foods just never need to be consumed. We’re meant to feel like they do…for sales…and the five minutes of bliss we’re in when we eat said shit…but as I read in an article about someone else who had done the Whole 30 diet…the sugar/food comas that follow the binging (or just general shit eating) are never worth the few moments of bliss.
So why do we do it? Think about it. Some of us (maybe most of us) have trained ourselves to eat the shit…so the “coma” state is familiar to us…we don’t know any different.
You don’t know different until you do something different. Until you make a different choice.
So that’s what the next 30 days will be for me.
This journey is still far from over…and yet…I’ve set myself up the last three months for great success. I’ve been in the gym every week day except two weeks when I got strangely ill (strange? or induced by the lowered immunity due to smoking, drinking and shit eating? :)) so the gym continues…and now the diet will balance properly.
I’m very excited and very committed and motivated. I intend to feel this same way on Day 30 and beyond. I’ll do my best to update every single day.
For reference, I’ll post my meals every post too…that should get me back here every day. :)
Day 1 – Monday
Breakfast – 3 eggs (pre-whole 30 shopping)
Lunch – RxBar, can of salmon, handful of cashews and almonds, banana
Dinner – Beef and Sweet Potato stew [FRIGGIN YUM] (Whole 30 Recipe)
Snack – Handful of cashews and almonds, slice of pear
Day 2 – Tuesday
Breakfast – 2 eggs, banana, one potato (hash browned, cooked in olive oil)
Lunch – Can of salmon, cucumber, handful of cashews and almonds
Snack – Apple, RxBar
Dinner – Beef Chuck Roast Stew (Whole 30 Recipe)
Tuesday, January 3, 2017
Friday, September 30, 2016
Mid-Week Contemplations
I wanted to divert the focus for just a moment and talk about what’s been on my mind all week. I wake up every day and feel different from the previous. In some ways better, some ways more challenging, but I keep myself motivated every single day, no matter what the circumstances.
I’ve now finished the second full week of workouts and diet following and I’m pretty proud of myself. However, there’s one big nag still hanging in my reality. One I hope to get rid of as quick as possible.
The first week it felt like weight was coming off very easy. Followed by that, my body fat percentage dropped down. By this past Monday (beginning of Week 2) my body fat percentage shot back up, but I was still losing weight. I felt slightly different physically, but not enough to celebrate just yet, being only through the first week.
This week, the fat percentage hasn't budged and I've barely lost a pound. Except today, looking in the mirror after my workout, I felt like I could definitely tell a difference...I feel like my belly and chest are a little smaller, and my arms and legs are bigger in the right places.
My concerns are that I'm going to wake up tomorrow at or barely under 202.2 (the same weight I've been the last three days), and the fat percentage won't have moved again (it was at 26.2 last Saturday when I checked in, but then went right back up to 27-27.7 all week).
What kicks me the most is that I can be appreciative and happy about the different points of progress that happen each day, whether it's pounds down, body fat percentage down, or just feeling better in some way…but I can't find the key to make all three happen at once…and part of me thinks it may be impossible.
But that's what I'm trying to find, so I'm disappointed when only one (or none) of those three things happen.
Frank, who’s been helping me since I got serious again, reminded me that “it's a big picture thing and you have to keep that in mind. Especially the first time you try something like this that doesn't rely on an extreme and unsafe calorie deficit or stupid food rules.”
That was exactly what all my previous diets were. Unsafe calorie deficits and stupid food rules. This one allows me to eat what I want, staying inside my macros, and kicking my ass in the gym. I’m doing it all right…I’m just not getting what I want out of it faster…or am I?
My biggest crutch is the damn scale and monitor, which, as Frank pointed out, is everyone’s crutch. I'm obsessed with tracking “for science”, but I need to not let it get to me if it's not progressing the way I think it should. Because if I take away the numbers, I look and feel 100 times better today than I did two weeks ago. That's priceless in itself and I think I'm diminishing that feeling by expectations of what I'm going to see on the scale/monitor.
It’s just about looking at goals differently and getting what I want when I’m not even paying attention.
Case in point, I still dread the weekends. Of not doing working out. I always feel like that will ruin me. But last weekend with all the shit I did, I still stayed right on track. So I have something to compare it to and know I can go that far, but it won't be hard not to go that far.
The best metaphor I can come up with right now is a politician in a debate. The numbers on the scale and monitor are promises said in debates.
How I look and how I feel are the truth…
…and that's all that should ultimately matter.
I’ve now finished the second full week of workouts and diet following and I’m pretty proud of myself. However, there’s one big nag still hanging in my reality. One I hope to get rid of as quick as possible.
The first week it felt like weight was coming off very easy. Followed by that, my body fat percentage dropped down. By this past Monday (beginning of Week 2) my body fat percentage shot back up, but I was still losing weight. I felt slightly different physically, but not enough to celebrate just yet, being only through the first week.
This week, the fat percentage hasn't budged and I've barely lost a pound. Except today, looking in the mirror after my workout, I felt like I could definitely tell a difference...I feel like my belly and chest are a little smaller, and my arms and legs are bigger in the right places.
My concerns are that I'm going to wake up tomorrow at or barely under 202.2 (the same weight I've been the last three days), and the fat percentage won't have moved again (it was at 26.2 last Saturday when I checked in, but then went right back up to 27-27.7 all week).
What kicks me the most is that I can be appreciative and happy about the different points of progress that happen each day, whether it's pounds down, body fat percentage down, or just feeling better in some way…but I can't find the key to make all three happen at once…and part of me thinks it may be impossible.
But that's what I'm trying to find, so I'm disappointed when only one (or none) of those three things happen.
Frank, who’s been helping me since I got serious again, reminded me that “it's a big picture thing and you have to keep that in mind. Especially the first time you try something like this that doesn't rely on an extreme and unsafe calorie deficit or stupid food rules.”
That was exactly what all my previous diets were. Unsafe calorie deficits and stupid food rules. This one allows me to eat what I want, staying inside my macros, and kicking my ass in the gym. I’m doing it all right…I’m just not getting what I want out of it faster…or am I?
My biggest crutch is the damn scale and monitor, which, as Frank pointed out, is everyone’s crutch. I'm obsessed with tracking “for science”, but I need to not let it get to me if it's not progressing the way I think it should. Because if I take away the numbers, I look and feel 100 times better today than I did two weeks ago. That's priceless in itself and I think I'm diminishing that feeling by expectations of what I'm going to see on the scale/monitor.
It’s just about looking at goals differently and getting what I want when I’m not even paying attention.
Case in point, I still dread the weekends. Of not doing working out. I always feel like that will ruin me. But last weekend with all the shit I did, I still stayed right on track. So I have something to compare it to and know I can go that far, but it won't be hard not to go that far.
The best metaphor I can come up with right now is a politician in a debate. The numbers on the scale and monitor are promises said in debates.
How I look and how I feel are the truth…
…and that's all that should ultimately matter.
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
Week 7 of 21 – Same Place, Stronger Face
Starting Weight – 202.2
Current Weight – 202.2
Starting Body Fat Percentage – 27.7%
Current Body Fat Percentage – 26.2%
Goal Body Fat Percentage – 10%
HEY LOOK, I’M ON SCHEDULE ;)
What a week. This new routine is kicking my ass, and I’m taking it willingly and loving almost every second. There’s a few exercises I despise, but that’s only because I’m weak in those areas. But I’m getting stronger. And exercises that I thought I wouldn’t like, I’m actually loving. Like dead lifts, back squats and cable crunches which before two weeks ago I didn’t know existed.
I’m feeling new muscles every day and feeling their strength with every move. It’s an amazing feeling. I was so used to feeling stagnant, sore and low energy. Obviously getting my butt up at 5am every morning and going to the gym has changed that. It’s also been a lot easier than I predicted. I’m looking forward to it every day, and the only hard days (after one week of course) were Monday and Friday. Monday because it was Day 1…duh, and Friday because I definitely felt tired from working out every day that week. Tuesday-Thursday I was on fire. Now in Week 2, I feel even better and am upping my weights to hit new goals.
Things are good. Still working on my diet. This past weekend was crazy. I made my calorie goal on Saturday and woke up Sunday a pound heavier…Sunday I didn’t count any calories and know I went way over, and woke up Monday a pound lighter. So what the eff. What’s most exciting is that I lost 1.5% of body fat in just the first week. That’s excellent and amazing. My goal Is 1% a week, so if I can hit that, I’ll be at 10% mid-January. It’s a very lofty goal, but it’s one to add to the books. I don’t think I can expect to lose 1% toward the end, but we’ll just see. For now, I’m happy motivating myself every day with exercise and diet…so I’m just going to be as patient as possible as I slowly creep to these goals.
I may be at the same weight as I started this whole journey…but I have a lot more determination, motivation and muscle to keep me on track. :)
Current Weight – 202.2
Starting Body Fat Percentage – 27.7%
Current Body Fat Percentage – 26.2%
Goal Body Fat Percentage – 10%
HEY LOOK, I’M ON SCHEDULE ;)
What a week. This new routine is kicking my ass, and I’m taking it willingly and loving almost every second. There’s a few exercises I despise, but that’s only because I’m weak in those areas. But I’m getting stronger. And exercises that I thought I wouldn’t like, I’m actually loving. Like dead lifts, back squats and cable crunches which before two weeks ago I didn’t know existed.
I’m feeling new muscles every day and feeling their strength with every move. It’s an amazing feeling. I was so used to feeling stagnant, sore and low energy. Obviously getting my butt up at 5am every morning and going to the gym has changed that. It’s also been a lot easier than I predicted. I’m looking forward to it every day, and the only hard days (after one week of course) were Monday and Friday. Monday because it was Day 1…duh, and Friday because I definitely felt tired from working out every day that week. Tuesday-Thursday I was on fire. Now in Week 2, I feel even better and am upping my weights to hit new goals.
Things are good. Still working on my diet. This past weekend was crazy. I made my calorie goal on Saturday and woke up Sunday a pound heavier…Sunday I didn’t count any calories and know I went way over, and woke up Monday a pound lighter. So what the eff. What’s most exciting is that I lost 1.5% of body fat in just the first week. That’s excellent and amazing. My goal Is 1% a week, so if I can hit that, I’ll be at 10% mid-January. It’s a very lofty goal, but it’s one to add to the books. I don’t think I can expect to lose 1% toward the end, but we’ll just see. For now, I’m happy motivating myself every day with exercise and diet…so I’m just going to be as patient as possible as I slowly creep to these goals.
I may be at the same weight as I started this whole journey…but I have a lot more determination, motivation and muscle to keep me on track. :)
Wednesday, September 21, 2016
Week 6 of 21 – New Day, New Plan
Starting Weight – 202.2
Current Weight – 203.2
OH HI. THIS IS STILL A THING. :)
I wasn’t about to write earlier than this and have still a bunch of excuses as to why I’m where I’m at. What I present to you now is the changing of the tides. As they have finally changed.
Now while that number may scare you, it shouldn’t. Over the last few weeks I’ve gotten as high as 206. I couldn’t find a way to get myself back on track. Until I spent a good part of an evening talking to a good friend who’s been training and weight lifting for almost a year. He found a great website by a guy who has done every exercise, every fad diet, every weight loss plan and knows how to do it and do it effectively. That combined with my friend’s knowledge and experience, I finally found my in.
Two days ago I started with the routine I’ve talked about for months now…getting up at 5am and going to the gym, being home by 6:30 to get ready for work and then going. Then I have the rest of the day to not have to think about it. On top of a very strict (but very satisfying) diet, I feel very confident I’ve finally broken the seal I’ve wanted to for ages.
My diet is focused on macronutrients, which are essential for weight training. My past diets, while effective, have only focused on caloric intake. I was focused only on weight loss, but not the most effective way to do that while bulking up my body into a healthier vessel. Now I’ve got the support I’ve been craving as well as a clear plan diet wise and exercise wise. I’m very excited, and after three straight days of getting up early and going to the gym, I can say I think I’m finally addicted again.
Weight training is a lot more fun than I expected…I feel like when I would train with trainers before, they would push me in any and all ways, exercising my whole body, which would leave me sore and exhausted for days following. This plan I’m on now works upper and lower body on alternating days, and is very effective at targeting groups I didn’t know exist. I’m loving the feeling I have in my body now.
So here’s to keeping it going. I wanted this to be a short update just to say I’m still in this…I’m not ever giving up…and now I think I finally have a solid plan. I still have a goal of 180 by Christmas…I’m sure I can do it. And I’m also more concerned with body fat percentage and consistency at this point…so the weekly goals are (realistically) gone. It’s no longer about how fast I can lose the weight. It’s about watching my body morph with this effective training and dieting over the next 15 weeks. I’m fucking excited. :)
Current Weight – 203.2
OH HI. THIS IS STILL A THING. :)
I wasn’t about to write earlier than this and have still a bunch of excuses as to why I’m where I’m at. What I present to you now is the changing of the tides. As they have finally changed.
Now while that number may scare you, it shouldn’t. Over the last few weeks I’ve gotten as high as 206. I couldn’t find a way to get myself back on track. Until I spent a good part of an evening talking to a good friend who’s been training and weight lifting for almost a year. He found a great website by a guy who has done every exercise, every fad diet, every weight loss plan and knows how to do it and do it effectively. That combined with my friend’s knowledge and experience, I finally found my in.
Two days ago I started with the routine I’ve talked about for months now…getting up at 5am and going to the gym, being home by 6:30 to get ready for work and then going. Then I have the rest of the day to not have to think about it. On top of a very strict (but very satisfying) diet, I feel very confident I’ve finally broken the seal I’ve wanted to for ages.
My diet is focused on macronutrients, which are essential for weight training. My past diets, while effective, have only focused on caloric intake. I was focused only on weight loss, but not the most effective way to do that while bulking up my body into a healthier vessel. Now I’ve got the support I’ve been craving as well as a clear plan diet wise and exercise wise. I’m very excited, and after three straight days of getting up early and going to the gym, I can say I think I’m finally addicted again.
Weight training is a lot more fun than I expected…I feel like when I would train with trainers before, they would push me in any and all ways, exercising my whole body, which would leave me sore and exhausted for days following. This plan I’m on now works upper and lower body on alternating days, and is very effective at targeting groups I didn’t know exist. I’m loving the feeling I have in my body now.
So here’s to keeping it going. I wanted this to be a short update just to say I’m still in this…I’m not ever giving up…and now I think I finally have a solid plan. I still have a goal of 180 by Christmas…I’m sure I can do it. And I’m also more concerned with body fat percentage and consistency at this point…so the weekly goals are (realistically) gone. It’s no longer about how fast I can lose the weight. It’s about watching my body morph with this effective training and dieting over the next 15 weeks. I’m fucking excited. :)
Tuesday, August 23, 2016
Week 2 of 21 – Retaliation of the Naughty List
Starting Weight – 202.2
Current Weight – 200.2
08/10 – Week 1 – Goal of 160 (202 – 42 pounds to go)
08/17 – Week 2 – 5 Pounds Down (197) – Ice Cream Cone
08/24 – Week 3 – 7 Pounds Down (195) – SAW Blu-Ray
Okay, I’m a little late on reporting…SORRY…but yeah. Week 1 was…kind of a nice little trial run…filled with all of the things I forbade myself from doing. However, I will say, to be positive…I’ve learned moderation. I’m no longer binging, and while I have my cravings once in awhile, I’m giving in only infrequently, not every day anymore. Also, I’m practicing moderation and limiting portions when I do. So…I’m slowly building the resistance and persistence of this process. I was doing really well with getting in the gym every day for some interval cardio. I still need to start the habit of my weight training in the morning. That will come hopefully within the next week.
So, I know I’m almost a week late on reporting, and I will have another report tomorrow, but I promised I would keep up with this…so, better late than never. I’m giving you the Week 1 highlights this time and will update on what happened Week 2 tomorrow.
Week 1 was harder than I thought. Not on the eating scale (no pun intended), but the working out and being conscious of timeliness eating and what was eaten. It’s been a stressful couple of weeks, but I know that’s no excuse. I have complete control, as I said, over what enters my mouth. I’m putting the smack down. Slowly but surely…
Current Weight – 200.2
08/10 – Week 1 – Goal of 160 (202 – 42 pounds to go)
08/17 – Week 2 – 5 Pounds Down (197) – Ice Cream Cone
08/24 – Week 3 – 7 Pounds Down (195) – SAW Blu-Ray
Okay, I’m a little late on reporting…SORRY…but yeah. Week 1 was…kind of a nice little trial run…filled with all of the things I forbade myself from doing. However, I will say, to be positive…I’ve learned moderation. I’m no longer binging, and while I have my cravings once in awhile, I’m giving in only infrequently, not every day anymore. Also, I’m practicing moderation and limiting portions when I do. So…I’m slowly building the resistance and persistence of this process. I was doing really well with getting in the gym every day for some interval cardio. I still need to start the habit of my weight training in the morning. That will come hopefully within the next week.
So, I know I’m almost a week late on reporting, and I will have another report tomorrow, but I promised I would keep up with this…so, better late than never. I’m giving you the Week 1 highlights this time and will update on what happened Week 2 tomorrow.
Week 1 was harder than I thought. Not on the eating scale (no pun intended), but the working out and being conscious of timeliness eating and what was eaten. It’s been a stressful couple of weeks, but I know that’s no excuse. I have complete control, as I said, over what enters my mouth. I’m putting the smack down. Slowly but surely…
Wednesday, August 10, 2016
Week 1 of 21 – Less Time For Demons
84 Day Work Weight Loss Challenge Results
Competition Start Weight – 203.2
Competition End Weight – 195.6
Total Lost During Competition – 7.6 (3.7%)
Current Weight – 202.2
Goal Weight - 160.0
I’M NOT DEAD
I’M NOT GIVING UP!
I JUST TOOK A VACATION FROM THINKING ABOUT THIS I GUESS. ;)
And now I’m back. I promised I would…just not this late.
I’m writing this before I start something new, Wednesday 8/10, because I’ve got a lot in me I want out. And a decent update was deserved. :) So just know, based on the numbers above, I’m not aware of them yet. I’m sure I’ll write an update if the numbers shock me, but I have a pretty good idea of where I’ll be at. I’m going to guesstimate…202. (update: boom)
Which means I’ll be at 42 pounds to lose by Christmas. That’s my goal. New goal. Good to have goals. BUT…where I fail, is the lack of small goals. That’s the ultimate inspiration for this blog post. This is more for my accountability, and it will be nice to have something to look at more frequently to remind me why I’m doing what I’m doing.
The first thing I must do is revamp my life. They say “don’t neglect yourself of anything”…but I tend to love to binge. So I’m on probation. Time out. Restraining order. Whatever you want to call it. From the following foods/habits:
No alcohol.
No processed sugar (candy, donuts, ice cream, etc.)
No sodas (diet or otherwise)
No processed starches (white breads, chips, bagels, etc.)
However, we are all human and I’m allowing myself to make a mistake or fail. With that, I am giving myself three strikes a week. Obviously the goal is not to have any strikes at all, but limiting myself to cheat three times in a week is really not that bad of a deal. I have listed prizes/gifts to myself below for each week of progress. Assuming I don’t get three strikes and I meet my goal of two pounds a week…I get to unlock that prize/gift. They are as follows:
08/10 – Week 1 – Goal of 160 (202 – 42 pounds to go)
08/17 – Week 2 – 5 Pounds Down (197) – Ice Cream Cone
08/24 – Week 3 – 7 Pounds Down (195) – SAW Blu-Ray
08/31 – Week 4 – 9 Pounds Down (193) – Donut
09/07 – Week 5 – 11 Pounds Down (191) – SAW II Blu-Ray
09/14 – Week 6 – 13 Pounds Down (189) – Gummy Bears
09/21 – Week 7 – 15 Pounds Down (187) – SAW III Blu-Ray
09/28 – Week 8 – 17 Pounds Down (185) – Ice Cream Cone
10/05 – Week 9 – 19 Pounds Down (183) – SAW IV Blu-Ray
10/12 – Week 10 – 21 Pounds Down (181) – Donut
10/19 – Week 11 – 23 Pounds Down (179) – SAW VI Blu-Ray
10/26 – Week 12 – 25 Pounds Down (177) – SAW VII Blu-Ray
11/02 – Week 13 – 27 Pounds Down (175) – Ice Cream Cone
11/09 – Week 14 – 29 Pounds Down (173) – Donut
11/16 – Week 15 – 31 Pounds Down (171) – Star Fox 3DS
11/23 – Week 16 – 33 Pounds Down (169) – Ice Cream Cone
11/30 – Week 17 – 35 Pounds Down (167) – Donut
12/07 – Week 18 – 37 Pounds Down (165) – Mortal Kombat Blu-Ray
12/14 – Week 19 – 39 Pounds Down (163) – Ice Cream Cone
12/21 – Week 20 – 41 Pounds Down (161) – Mortal Kombat 2 Blu-Ray
12/28 – Week 21 – 43 Pounds Down (159) – Reassess Your Life
I reserve the right to amend this list in any way pending difference of desire that week, or if I don’t reach the goal, I will trade a prize with another if it was something I was looking forward to. As I progress through this, I will update this list with the outcomes.
If this all goes as planned…with a measly 2 pounds expected loss per week…I will be the lightest I’ve been since I was a pre-teen. What a great way to go into the new year having met my weight loss goal, seeing a completely different me, and hopefully having some muscle by that point to make the maintenance easier.
Two pounds a week is not hard to accomplish with enough dedication and commitment. As my broken record keeps playing…I’ve done it before…and I want to do it again. For the last time. With the prizes/gifts for myself for accomplishing these goals every week…incentive my dear padawans.
This weight loss challenge is far from over.
The games have just begun.
And you WILL get weekly updates on the aforementioned dates.
I’m so excited…here’s hoping I’m actually at 202 by the morning...
I WAS. :-D
However, in my brilliance, I thought I was being strong and brave by not having a soda with my lunch…and then I forgot chips were on the list…strike one… :| I AM TRYING TO GET RID OF ALL MY CRAP (while staying within my daily calorie limit ;) GET OFF ME)
See you next week…
Competition Start Weight – 203.2
Competition End Weight – 195.6
Total Lost During Competition – 7.6 (3.7%)
Current Weight – 202.2
Goal Weight - 160.0
I’M NOT DEAD
I’M NOT GIVING UP!
I JUST TOOK A VACATION FROM THINKING ABOUT THIS I GUESS. ;)
And now I’m back. I promised I would…just not this late.
I’m writing this before I start something new, Wednesday 8/10, because I’ve got a lot in me I want out. And a decent update was deserved. :) So just know, based on the numbers above, I’m not aware of them yet. I’m sure I’ll write an update if the numbers shock me, but I have a pretty good idea of where I’ll be at. I’m going to guesstimate…202. (update: boom)
Which means I’ll be at 42 pounds to lose by Christmas. That’s my goal. New goal. Good to have goals. BUT…where I fail, is the lack of small goals. That’s the ultimate inspiration for this blog post. This is more for my accountability, and it will be nice to have something to look at more frequently to remind me why I’m doing what I’m doing.
The first thing I must do is revamp my life. They say “don’t neglect yourself of anything”…but I tend to love to binge. So I’m on probation. Time out. Restraining order. Whatever you want to call it. From the following foods/habits:
No alcohol.
No processed sugar (candy, donuts, ice cream, etc.)
No sodas (diet or otherwise)
No processed starches (white breads, chips, bagels, etc.)
However, we are all human and I’m allowing myself to make a mistake or fail. With that, I am giving myself three strikes a week. Obviously the goal is not to have any strikes at all, but limiting myself to cheat three times in a week is really not that bad of a deal. I have listed prizes/gifts to myself below for each week of progress. Assuming I don’t get three strikes and I meet my goal of two pounds a week…I get to unlock that prize/gift. They are as follows:
08/10 – Week 1 – Goal of 160 (202 – 42 pounds to go)
08/17 – Week 2 – 5 Pounds Down (197) – Ice Cream Cone
08/24 – Week 3 – 7 Pounds Down (195) – SAW Blu-Ray
08/31 – Week 4 – 9 Pounds Down (193) – Donut
09/07 – Week 5 – 11 Pounds Down (191) – SAW II Blu-Ray
09/14 – Week 6 – 13 Pounds Down (189) – Gummy Bears
09/21 – Week 7 – 15 Pounds Down (187) – SAW III Blu-Ray
09/28 – Week 8 – 17 Pounds Down (185) – Ice Cream Cone
10/05 – Week 9 – 19 Pounds Down (183) – SAW IV Blu-Ray
10/12 – Week 10 – 21 Pounds Down (181) – Donut
10/19 – Week 11 – 23 Pounds Down (179) – SAW VI Blu-Ray
10/26 – Week 12 – 25 Pounds Down (177) – SAW VII Blu-Ray
11/02 – Week 13 – 27 Pounds Down (175) – Ice Cream Cone
11/09 – Week 14 – 29 Pounds Down (173) – Donut
11/16 – Week 15 – 31 Pounds Down (171) – Star Fox 3DS
11/23 – Week 16 – 33 Pounds Down (169) – Ice Cream Cone
11/30 – Week 17 – 35 Pounds Down (167) – Donut
12/07 – Week 18 – 37 Pounds Down (165) – Mortal Kombat Blu-Ray
12/14 – Week 19 – 39 Pounds Down (163) – Ice Cream Cone
12/21 – Week 20 – 41 Pounds Down (161) – Mortal Kombat 2 Blu-Ray
12/28 – Week 21 – 43 Pounds Down (159) – Reassess Your Life
I reserve the right to amend this list in any way pending difference of desire that week, or if I don’t reach the goal, I will trade a prize with another if it was something I was looking forward to. As I progress through this, I will update this list with the outcomes.
If this all goes as planned…with a measly 2 pounds expected loss per week…I will be the lightest I’ve been since I was a pre-teen. What a great way to go into the new year having met my weight loss goal, seeing a completely different me, and hopefully having some muscle by that point to make the maintenance easier.
Two pounds a week is not hard to accomplish with enough dedication and commitment. As my broken record keeps playing…I’ve done it before…and I want to do it again. For the last time. With the prizes/gifts for myself for accomplishing these goals every week…incentive my dear padawans.
This weight loss challenge is far from over.
The games have just begun.
And you WILL get weekly updates on the aforementioned dates.
I’m so excited…here’s hoping I’m actually at 202 by the morning...
I WAS. :-D
However, in my brilliance, I thought I was being strong and brave by not having a soda with my lunch…and then I forgot chips were on the list…strike one… :| I AM TRYING TO GET RID OF ALL MY CRAP (while staying within my daily calorie limit ;) GET OFF ME)
See you next week…
Thursday, June 9, 2016
Day 77 of 84 – The Rains of Castamere
Competition Start Weight – 203.2
Current Weight – 194.2
Total Weight Lost To Date – 9.0 (4.4%)
Six weeks. Six weeks and it felt like I hadn’t done any of it. What the actual fuck.
The last two days have been some of the hardest lately, and I’m finally mentally sound to be able to write this without vomiting all over the page in rage, so, let’s focus on the good stuff for now.
I found this interesting article that further proves what I’ve been hearing little by little over the years in that cardio really doesn’t mean a lot for weight loss as some programs will tell you. It’s good for your circulatory system and overall health. But as far as weight loss goes, I love the way they put it.
“Working out for the sake of burning calories (i.e., cardio) is like paying off credit card debt. Exercising to build muscle (i.e., strength training) is like paying a mortgage. By building muscle mass, you’re building an asset, not trying to move forward on a metaphorical treadmill.”
Here's the article: Feel like Weight Loss Is Hopeless?
This article also goes into all the different ways your body works, and explains further why there’s hundreds of weight loss programs out there…because every body is different, and everyone needs to train their body in a specific way to maintain the weight they want to be at. Which really sucks for the underweight and the overweight. Especially for us overweight folks…
“As long as you are below your initial weight, your body is going to try to get you back,” says Dr. Michael Schwartz in the article.
Well fuck you, science.
Not really :) I said I was in a better mood, and I am…but I’m still completely frustrated. However, I know what I can and cannot do, and I am only going to take it one moment, one day at a time.
D-Day for me and my love is the day we get back from Mexico. Once we finally have a proper vacation and get all our party bugs out and satisfied, we can come back and tackle the rest of the year hopefully with clear paths and goals. There’s nothing big happening between now and Christmas, so it’s the perfect time to really get focused again and finish this first leg of the journey.
What I can learn from this article is that yes, while it may be hard to get to your goal weight, consistency in routine and diet over a long period of time will make it easier to maintain your new lifestyle and weight. I know this for a fact myself, because when I initially lost my 50 pounds a few years ago, I was able to stay within 35-45 pounds lost until the last few months, which inspired this program and blog. To date, I’m at 33 pounds less from my initial weight that I held for almost ten years. So to keep over 30 pounds off in the two years I’ve been beating myself up? Eye opening. I shouldn’t be beating myself. That’s the point.
I came to that realization last night on the way to the airport to pick up some family. My worst enemy is me. It always has been. I need to stop beating myself up for the way I am, because honestly, there’s NOTHING wrong with me. I’m very healthy, I have no maladies of any kind that would prevent me from living the life I want to. And you know something? I HAVE been living the life I’ve wanted to. The only issue is, I’m looking at myself believing I am not what I want to be or can be. And both of those are simply not true. I am the culmination of every life choice I’ve made up until this point. And if I want any of it to change, only I can. So complaining about it isn’t going to help. Wishing for things to be different and disappointed when they don’t change in less than 24 hours…yeah that’s going to make me fucking miserable. So I know I’ve got to knock that shit off.
As I mentioned before, I’m much better mentally today than I have been the last couple days and I hope it lasts. I don’t like the way it’s made me feel, or the way I’ve been treating people because of it. I honestly felt like my old depression was creeping in. And it’s very possible it was/is. Addiction is a fucked up thing. I’ve got to beat it. For my sake, and for my dream’s sake.
Six weeks of not smoking. Six weeks of being strong and feeling confident and ready to say goodbye to it (again) forever. Tuesday was the first day I was without the patch. I thought I was golden. That was until 5 minutes after I woke up and it felt like every moment of the day was against me. I rationally know this is bullshit. But it’s not how it felt. From the clumsiness of myself getting ready in the morning, the lateness of my getting to work, the people on the roads forgetting how to drive and nearly hitting me, to the attitudes of everyone at work (mostly my perception I’m sure), and the insanity of the work day, on top of the same-but-different-and-in-some-ways-worse commute home…I couldn’t do it. It pissed me off on top of everything else that it felt like I hadn’t quit for those six weeks at all. Like the last cigarette I had was yesterday. Because of the patches preventing the withdrawal process, it didn’t feel like I had quit at all when the first day without them. I felt so outside of my body mentally and physically, I didn’t want to feel that way anymore.
So I smoked.
And what did I discover? Sure, while I may have physically and mentally rebalanced over the last couple days, the smoking does NOT taste/feel/smell good…I did NOT miss it…I do NOT need it…I do NOT want it…but I also don’t want to wear the patches the rest of my life.
Now, coming back to REALITY…nicotine stays in the system for two days.
Two days.
48 hours.
I’ve marathoned longer.
I’ve also done this before.
Every time I’ve quit, I’ve done it cold turkey. And one of those times I did it cold turkey I was successful quitting for over a year and a half.
So I know I can do it.
I just need to not be around people for 48 hours. And prepare for the withdrawal side effects which have been insomnia, sweating, irritability (duh), and general (severe) mental instability. This is why it’s best I do this with as little contact with people as possible. I don’t like who I am going through withdrawal, and I don’t need other people subjected to it.
So this is why the day after Mexico is D-Day. We will be gone for six days. We will drink, smoke and eat our hearts out. Pure bliss.
Upon returning, it will be on a Wednesday. I have Thursday-Sunday, four days (which I’ve taken off of work) to deal with my withdrawal as I get over this addiction cold turkey, and move past the PHYSICAL addiction. The mental part I can handle when the physical withdrawal doesn’t fuck with my head.
TL;DR – Don’t smoke, kids. It’ll ruin your life. Or kill you. Or both.
I’ve done this before. All of it. Weight loss, quitting smoking. It’s just harder to process and move through when you’re back in the stages of unhappiness and imbalance. So, hopefully this entire blog hasn’t sounded like one big bitch/whine fest. Cause it really isn’t. This is me at my most raw. This is me at my most vulnerable. This is me saying I can’t stand my physical reality, but I do love and respect and am proud of who I am and what I’ve accomplished thus far. I’m only trying to change the last few things I’d rather not experience in this lifetime. There is so much more out there I have yet to experience, and I will not leave this planet until I do.
I think a goals post is called for once this initial challenge is over. As I said, this blog is not ceasing at the end of the 84 days.
Oh the fun is just beginning.
Current Weight – 194.2
Total Weight Lost To Date – 9.0 (4.4%)
Six weeks. Six weeks and it felt like I hadn’t done any of it. What the actual fuck.
The last two days have been some of the hardest lately, and I’m finally mentally sound to be able to write this without vomiting all over the page in rage, so, let’s focus on the good stuff for now.
I found this interesting article that further proves what I’ve been hearing little by little over the years in that cardio really doesn’t mean a lot for weight loss as some programs will tell you. It’s good for your circulatory system and overall health. But as far as weight loss goes, I love the way they put it.
“Working out for the sake of burning calories (i.e., cardio) is like paying off credit card debt. Exercising to build muscle (i.e., strength training) is like paying a mortgage. By building muscle mass, you’re building an asset, not trying to move forward on a metaphorical treadmill.”
Here's the article: Feel like Weight Loss Is Hopeless?
This article also goes into all the different ways your body works, and explains further why there’s hundreds of weight loss programs out there…because every body is different, and everyone needs to train their body in a specific way to maintain the weight they want to be at. Which really sucks for the underweight and the overweight. Especially for us overweight folks…
“As long as you are below your initial weight, your body is going to try to get you back,” says Dr. Michael Schwartz in the article.
Well fuck you, science.
Not really :) I said I was in a better mood, and I am…but I’m still completely frustrated. However, I know what I can and cannot do, and I am only going to take it one moment, one day at a time.
D-Day for me and my love is the day we get back from Mexico. Once we finally have a proper vacation and get all our party bugs out and satisfied, we can come back and tackle the rest of the year hopefully with clear paths and goals. There’s nothing big happening between now and Christmas, so it’s the perfect time to really get focused again and finish this first leg of the journey.
What I can learn from this article is that yes, while it may be hard to get to your goal weight, consistency in routine and diet over a long period of time will make it easier to maintain your new lifestyle and weight. I know this for a fact myself, because when I initially lost my 50 pounds a few years ago, I was able to stay within 35-45 pounds lost until the last few months, which inspired this program and blog. To date, I’m at 33 pounds less from my initial weight that I held for almost ten years. So to keep over 30 pounds off in the two years I’ve been beating myself up? Eye opening. I shouldn’t be beating myself. That’s the point.
I came to that realization last night on the way to the airport to pick up some family. My worst enemy is me. It always has been. I need to stop beating myself up for the way I am, because honestly, there’s NOTHING wrong with me. I’m very healthy, I have no maladies of any kind that would prevent me from living the life I want to. And you know something? I HAVE been living the life I’ve wanted to. The only issue is, I’m looking at myself believing I am not what I want to be or can be. And both of those are simply not true. I am the culmination of every life choice I’ve made up until this point. And if I want any of it to change, only I can. So complaining about it isn’t going to help. Wishing for things to be different and disappointed when they don’t change in less than 24 hours…yeah that’s going to make me fucking miserable. So I know I’ve got to knock that shit off.
As I mentioned before, I’m much better mentally today than I have been the last couple days and I hope it lasts. I don’t like the way it’s made me feel, or the way I’ve been treating people because of it. I honestly felt like my old depression was creeping in. And it’s very possible it was/is. Addiction is a fucked up thing. I’ve got to beat it. For my sake, and for my dream’s sake.
Six weeks of not smoking. Six weeks of being strong and feeling confident and ready to say goodbye to it (again) forever. Tuesday was the first day I was without the patch. I thought I was golden. That was until 5 minutes after I woke up and it felt like every moment of the day was against me. I rationally know this is bullshit. But it’s not how it felt. From the clumsiness of myself getting ready in the morning, the lateness of my getting to work, the people on the roads forgetting how to drive and nearly hitting me, to the attitudes of everyone at work (mostly my perception I’m sure), and the insanity of the work day, on top of the same-but-different-and-in-some-ways-worse commute home…I couldn’t do it. It pissed me off on top of everything else that it felt like I hadn’t quit for those six weeks at all. Like the last cigarette I had was yesterday. Because of the patches preventing the withdrawal process, it didn’t feel like I had quit at all when the first day without them. I felt so outside of my body mentally and physically, I didn’t want to feel that way anymore.
So I smoked.
And what did I discover? Sure, while I may have physically and mentally rebalanced over the last couple days, the smoking does NOT taste/feel/smell good…I did NOT miss it…I do NOT need it…I do NOT want it…but I also don’t want to wear the patches the rest of my life.
Now, coming back to REALITY…nicotine stays in the system for two days.
Two days.
48 hours.
I’ve marathoned longer.
I’ve also done this before.
Every time I’ve quit, I’ve done it cold turkey. And one of those times I did it cold turkey I was successful quitting for over a year and a half.
So I know I can do it.
I just need to not be around people for 48 hours. And prepare for the withdrawal side effects which have been insomnia, sweating, irritability (duh), and general (severe) mental instability. This is why it’s best I do this with as little contact with people as possible. I don’t like who I am going through withdrawal, and I don’t need other people subjected to it.
So this is why the day after Mexico is D-Day. We will be gone for six days. We will drink, smoke and eat our hearts out. Pure bliss.
Upon returning, it will be on a Wednesday. I have Thursday-Sunday, four days (which I’ve taken off of work) to deal with my withdrawal as I get over this addiction cold turkey, and move past the PHYSICAL addiction. The mental part I can handle when the physical withdrawal doesn’t fuck with my head.
TL;DR – Don’t smoke, kids. It’ll ruin your life. Or kill you. Or both.
I’ve done this before. All of it. Weight loss, quitting smoking. It’s just harder to process and move through when you’re back in the stages of unhappiness and imbalance. So, hopefully this entire blog hasn’t sounded like one big bitch/whine fest. Cause it really isn’t. This is me at my most raw. This is me at my most vulnerable. This is me saying I can’t stand my physical reality, but I do love and respect and am proud of who I am and what I’ve accomplished thus far. I’m only trying to change the last few things I’d rather not experience in this lifetime. There is so much more out there I have yet to experience, and I will not leave this planet until I do.
I think a goals post is called for once this initial challenge is over. As I said, this blog is not ceasing at the end of the 84 days.
Oh the fun is just beginning.
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